Valentine’s Day is fast approaching, and we all know that means you want to find that special someone to spend the day with, to find true love. If you’re a sucker for a Hallmark holiday that was brought to life during the Victorian era by displaying affection in the flimsiest of traditions which the modern era has capitalised on, and you really want to display some sort of undying love to another human at some stage, this article may be for you. If you’re not planning on asking anyone out, and you don’t seem to have any difficulties doing so anyway, you probably need to skip onto the bit about scabies below.
Firstly, there are many ways that you shouldn’t confess your love to someone, including:
- Anonymous letters, or anything anonymous for that matter; it’s just creepy and far too easy to do with various anonymous media platforms.
- Over social media. Unless you’re in some sort of super long distance relationship, surely it can wait until you see them in person?
- Getting someone else to do it for you. Are you 12 years old?
But, if you actually want to try and declare your eternal love for someone without it being creepy (if that is even possible?), here are some steps you should probably follow.
1) Strike up a conversation.
If you’re planning on professing your undying love to someone you might want to get to know them a little bit first? That girl that looks gorgeous that you see around campus all the time who you vaguely know through a friend of a friend probably won’t be too enamoured if you tell her your feelings out of the blue. Try getting to know them, becoming their friend, seeing if you still have feelings etc.
Again, that person you like, they probably don’t like you that much yet. Talk to them a bit more.
3) Weigh up the situation
So you’ve been a bit flirty with this person, and they seem to be responding in a similar manner? Success. Move onto step 4.
However, if they seem to be slow on the uptake, not regularly responding to your messages, or just out right avoiding you, it might be time to move on.
4) Ask them out.
You probably think this is the hardest step, but it might very well be the easiest. Don’t overthink it, arrange to do something simple. The dating scene in Cork can be regarded as “dry” at the best of times, and most people would jump at the chance to go for a simple coffee date, or a walk around campus. Choose proximate and cheap locations during the daytime, as inviting someone out on their own in the city during the night can be daunting. The Glucksman, for example, is a lovely spot on campus that does nice teas and coffees in a picturesque setting.
Or arrange to meet them out.
Maybe they like going for casual pints with their friends, or they really enjoy the Hanover? Maybe they would feel more comfortable if they had their group of friends around, or maybe you’d feel more comfortable if you had yours with you too? Why not arrange to meet up with them somewhere?
5) Patience pt. 2.
If neither of you have made a move by the time you have met up or directly afterwards, you may once again require patience. Everyone deserves to move at their own place, so whether you were shifting all night in the Bróg, or you just had a quiet chat, don’t get too disheartened if they don’t seem as on board as you. Some people take longer to develop feelings, and rushing or pressuring someone you’re into won’t work in your favour in the long run.
6) Repeat steps 3 and 4 until you feel comfortable.
I know you’re wondering, “can I just declare my undying love already?” No, you can’t. It is probably still too soon, you should wait until you’re married or something.