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Fresher Apathetic About The Fifteen

A first year student has confirmed that they absolutely do not care about the ‘Fresher’s Fifteen’.

In an exclusive interview with The Express, Sam Twomey, first year Arts, revealed that they truly do not give toss about the traditional college weight gain, and reportedly has no plans to start eating healthily or working out.

“A few of my friends had started worrying about weight gain in college, which is fair enough, but personally I just don’t really care. The only reason I ever plan to set foot in the Mardyke is for exams, and to be honest, even then I might not bother.”

Twomey’s opinions on a balanced diet and exercise range from “meh” to “Burpees are only something you should be doing after eating a magnificently-crafted student deal burrito,” and it seems that this year, Freshers are coming out in their hundreds to revolt against the pressure maintain a certain body type.

Law student Kerry Horgan had this to say: “Look, to each their own, but if I’ve got the choice each night between reheated spagbol and a spicebag, I know what I’m choosing. Lemon Tree for life.” Others were quick to agree – “Did you hear this week’s six-before-six is Pad Thai? What a world.”

Absolutely, it seems that many of this year’s first year students just could not give a shit about their weight, and are in fact, happy as they are. (Or preferably, happy as they are, but with a three-in-one in hand).